overflow post.

[zazen]

why is captcha always catching us.

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[candyrapper]

[ It doesn't take long until he's completely undone. He comes with a strangled cry, shaking and clawing at Jakurai's back as he spills out between them. ]

[zazen]

[He follows soon enough, not caring enough to pull out as he spills inside of Ramuda with a low groan. He's pretty sure those jealous Oneesans he surrounds himself with could never top anything they're doing right now.

He's taking a moment to wind down, breath coming out slow and shaky.]

[candyrapper]

[ He flops back on the bed, boneless and out of breath, trying to process how the old man still manages to blow every hookup he's ever had out of the water, over and over again. Even with a harem of extremely naughty oneesans, a successful track record for club pickups and the cute writer and dog gambler he chose to form the Posse he's so proud of, he figured at least one of them would be able to measure up. But no.

His fingers idly twirl a lock of Jakurai's hair, matted with sweat, but pretty nonetheless, practically begging to be tugged on if he actually had the energy to do it. ]

[zazen]

[He pulls out of Ramuda not too long after, giving in to the call of familiarity and settling on top of him before there can be any complaints. How does this brat always seem to worm his way back in just when Jakurai thinks he's forgotten him. Forgotten what he felt like, forgotten how sparks fly between them.

It's frustrating to him. He hates this almost as much as he hates Ramuda.]

Satisfied?

[candyrapper]

I can't believe you came in me.

[ His grumbling has no fire to it, it's little more than the complaint of a spoiled child.
He doesn't hate it anyway, not really; there've definitely been nights when he's demanded it from the old man loud enough for all of Shinjuku to hear.

There's a limp tug at his hair, but with him that close, it doesn't do much of anything. He gives up, idly running his fingers over the fresh scratches on Jakurai's back. ]

Good thing you're a doctor.

[zazen]

As if it were done any differently in the past?

[There isn't any energy behind his statements either, between their petty attempt at a rap battle and this. Even Jakurai has a limit to how much energy he can expend in one day.

He makes a disgruntled noise when Ramuda touches any of those open scratches, they sting. But the sting is refreshing, and not knowing how much damage was done is part of the thrill of the moment.]

[candyrapper]

Well. . . no.

[ His fingers skip off as he stops to think– remember– what they used to do. There's soft sigh as the touching comes back, feather light on the raised lines of skin. ]

I hate that you're so good at this.

[zazen]

You hate everything about me, don't you?

[One of Jakurai's hands comes to twirl strands of pink hair between his long fingers. Thinking is dangerous right now, thinking will lead to bad decisions.]

I did not believe it would still be good with you after all this time.

[candyrapper]

Yup! I really do hate e~verything about you! ♥ But sex is sex. If something worked out fine before, it's hard for it to suck.

[ Because some people separate themselves from their feelings on the battlefield, and others do it in the bedroom. Hospital Room. Details. ]

[zazen]

You would keep doing this if I let you.

[There isn't any resistance, he would let Ramuda come back and do this without question. But is that really something he's going to say out in the open? Of course not.]

Is sex with the person you hate really worth it, Ramuda-kun?

[candyrapper]

You didn't have any difficulty getting into it, for an old man. And what kind of question is that?

[ Because he doesn't want to think about it, especially because he's pretty good at reading people and suspects what Jakurai is looking for is a specific answer, a reason this keeps happening. ]

[zazen]

[Jakurai prides himself on being a man who thinks things through. He always has a reason for doing the things that he does, methodically and without missing a beat. But this time his train of thought dropped the ball and he fucked Ramuda right into this hospital bed.

He wants a reason, but he’s certain he won’t find it.]

My age has nothing to do with my ability to have sex.

[A beat, for once? Jakurai is going to give up.]

Forget it.

[candyrapper]

Good, don't think about it. You'll only get more headaches to go with your other headaches.

[ Shinjuku's Big Bad Wolf seems reduced to a cute puppy when he gives up; Ramuda combs through his hair gently, almost like a treat for trying not to think too hard for once. ]

[zazen]

There isn’t any use thinking about it.

[No one else will see this side of him. The Jakurai who is able to give in to his desires. The Jakurai who wants nothing more than to give his selfish side a little attention every once in a while.] Stay for a while.

[candyrapper]

[ He’s heard this request before, from people he can’t be bothered to remember, but Jakurai’s selfishness is like a super-exclusive limited-edition sweet only he gets to enjoy. He isn’t moving, he’s already decided he’s staying, but he’ll still ask: ]

What do I get if I do?

[zazen]

You’ve gotten everything you wanted, haven’t you?

[Let him be selfish for a moment, it’s rare and probably won’t happen again for a long time yet.]

[candyrapper]

[ Of course he got what he wanted, but more is always better, in his opinion. More attention and more spoiling are always accepted, but more glimpses into Jakurai's personal indulgences are interesting enough to keep his curiosity piqued for now.

One of the hands in his hair slips down to massage circles into his back. ]

Is this all you want?

[zazen]

Is it a problem?

[Ramuda could leave if he wanted, Jakurai wouldn’t stop him. But he can’t deny the hands on his back feel nice. He hates that this feels so normal and comfortable. He should never feel this way about Ramuda.]

[candyrapper]

No.

[ saying more than that would probably invite requests he might not want to entertain. Compared to the demands he’s made of others, just wanting to be close to someone else is so simple.

It’s boring, especially since he’s got an awesome running list of humiliating things he’d make Jakurai do if he had his way with him, but if this is all he wants, it’s easy enough to give. He kneads at the curve where his neck meets his shoulders teasing out the tension ]

[zazen]

[Really this isn’t all Jakurai wants, his selfishness extends far past what he wishes to admit to Ramuda’s face. He won’t do it. He knows what it is like to hurt at the hands of easy R, and in this moment it isn’t worth starting anything. Being close is the simplest and least controversial of the things he wants.

He lets his shoulders down again.]

I really hate how you can be like this. I hate everything about it.

[Yet he won’t make a move to toss the pink brat out.]

[candyrapper]

Want me to stop?

[ the massage he means, easing off of him until his hands are just hovering over his skin, because he won’t stop coming and going as he pleases, setting Jakurai off balance and bailing again ]

[zazen]

No.

[He reaches back, putting Ramuda’s hand back where it was. He’s going to take what he can get.]

[candyrapper]

Does it feel good?

[ He asks the question like he already knows the answer. Getting what you want always feels good, but he wants to hear Jakurai say it. ]

[zazen]

It feels good.

[He says it without much thought. Jakurai is still too earnest for his own good sometimes.]

[candyrapper]

[ he reaches a little further down, to the space between his shoulder blades ]

Anywhere else?